“you can survive the day if you’re uncomfortable, but you can’t fall asleep if you’re uncomfortable”

This quote was used today in my class. After reading “Four Loves” by C.S. Lewis, my insightful, offtrack, crazy, wonderful, time wasting professor said the first thing that made sense to me…. and today, I’m taking it a little lighter. This post is for old loves, first loves, distant loves and loves who lost their way…

He told the class, but I heard it as if it were directed at me,

After getting a divorce, the hardest thing the two partners notice, the thing they miss the most, happens at night: when they get into bed and realize the person who shared this bed with them, is no longer there. Those people are still confined to their one side of the bed, because they are so used to someone being on the other one. Night is the hardest, you can survive the day if you’re uncomfortable, but you can’t fall asleep if you’re uncomfortable.

Hopefully you cannot count the number of days that made you feel wonderful. I hope you have lost track. I hope these days are burned somewhere deep in your memory. Those days where the weather, the sounds, the food or the company make us feel hopeful. We feel we have made it through heartbreak, or loneliness or simply just missing that person we love. But then the night comes, and we slip into our pajamas. We brush our teeth, set our alarms and hop into bed. Fluff our pillows and get the covers arranged just right. And it hits us–something’s missing. Someone, rather. Sure eventually, hopefully, exhaustion will set in and we’ll fall asleep without them, but right now, for these few minutes we are anxious and lonely, tired but not tired enough to ignore the fact that no matter how perfect our day seemed, or how imperfect our loved one is, there is nothing, and I mean nothing like the feeling of sharing a pillow, stealing the covers, tangling your legs around theirs, saying ‘I love you’ and getting a kiss goodnight…


2 Responses to ““you can survive the day if you’re uncomfortable, but you can’t fall asleep if you’re uncomfortable””

  1. He is a time waster, but his words were wise and hit me today too. What if we were suddenly abandoned by everything familiar and the one person we love in the world died tomorrow? A friend of mine recently lost her husband, and when the professor said those words, all I could think about was the empathy I feel for her, now all alone in the big world.

    • Your quote from this “time waster” professor (now I’m curious!) sounds just like a scene from the movie Something’s Gotta Give –which was, I admit, a better film than I expected it to be. I’m pretty sure Diane Keaton’s character says almost the exact same thing.

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